READ IF YOU WANT TO CONNECT MORE WITH YOUR LOVE-ER.
I read in a very good book once that the most important decision you make in a lifetime is who you choose to be your spouse. They don’t teach you that in school.
Think about it.
You could be very far away from that decision right now. It doesn’t make it less important. Your focus might now be on yourself, your kids or your career. But your kids know about love and how to treat a spouse from…you. It’s not like you sat them down and taught them like maybe you did with the birds + the bees but they notice just the same.
It was important for me to find the right spouse before I had kids. And I’m not telling you that because – la-dee-da I found a great spouse – (which I did) but because I sacrificed having kids for the great spouse. Which I am 110% ok with how that worked out. For me, finding the right person took a while.
I tell you all this because ROF and I have a blast together. We really do. What I want for you is to have some ideas to connect, re-connect or just keep being you – together. Please let me know if you guys try any of these. In fact, snap them and tag #joyseekerscollective
DINE AROUND YOUR HOMETOWN
Each of you picks a different place for an appetizer, dinner, and dessert. It’s more fun if you can walk to these places. At the end do a “review” of best service, presentation, taste, etc…
LEARN SOMETHING NEW
Take turns picking a cooking, art, exercise, financial planning, mixologist, bird watching or anything type of class. This gives you something to talk about and creates memories.
TOP 100 MOVIES OF ALL TIME
ROF and I did this a while ago and didn’t finish. That’s a lot of movies. Quite honestly, I couldn’t get past the stupid Charlie Chaplin movies (!) But we worked our way up from the bottom of this list in order. It was fun watching some movies we would have never seen otherwise. Like Network or The Deer Hunter. Our nephew joined us for a summer and he loved joining in too. I even kept a book on what we thought of the movie.
PLAY CARDS
Seriously, how do couples get along without playing a regular game of gin rummy with each other? I don’t even know. ROF and I call this (jokingly) our “couples activity.” We have played an annual game of gin for the past 8-9 years in a row. From July 23 – July 23rd every year. AND YES ROF HAS WON EVERY.SINGLE.YEAR. We keep a book of our on-going score and jot a couple of notes next to the date on what we’re doing. We have played cards all around the world! Paris, NYC, Napa, Dallas, Toronto, Hawaii (we were asked to stop playing in the Maui airport because it was considered gambling!) ROF and I have a certain way of lovingly talking smack to each other while we play and we have some good laughs. When we want to play a quick series of 3 hands, we call that a “Q3” and we’ll do a “Q3” anywhere – anytime!
VOLUNTEER
COOK AT HOME TOGETHER
We use PLATED to easily cook meals together. We have fun doing it too. ROF is in charge of chopping (he’s very good at it…especially onions) and the meat and I’m in charge of the sauces and toasting things. I’m very good at putting things in the oven…haha. We’ve cooked over 226 Plated meals! We have our favorites but we especially like learning new techniques.
ROAD TRIP
Just get in the car and drive. And talk. Make a plan to visit an area or just throw caution to the wind.
DAY DRINK + ERRANDS
I don’t recommend this if you don’t drink. And this for sure shouldn’t be an every-weekend-kind of activity. But we did this once and still laugh about it.
ROF has his list of errands that he does on Saturday mornings if he is home. You know, dry cleaning, post office, taxidermy pick-up – regular errands. Sometimes I join along for company and we might stop for lunch.
On this one particular day, we decided since it was a beautiful, crisp, fall afternoon and there was a Wisconsin football game on, we decided to have Mexican food and a margarita or two. Then finish our errands.
fun.
HOLD HANDS (ONLY IF YOU TYPICALLY DON’T)
INTERVIEW EACH OTHER
I actually don’t know anyone that would literally do this but I’ll add a twist. On our second date, ROF and I did a volunteer project with his office in Dallas at a camp. It was a drive out there so he asked me to bring three questions on notecards and he would do the same. I still remember 2/3 questions he asked. One that we talked about for a while was: “What is the biggest lie you’ve told”
GET SCARED
PLAY MONOPOLY
SHOPPING CONTEST
Go to a garage sale, flea market or farmers market and choose an amount of money – like $5 and have a contest who can get the best value/deal/item for that amount. It’s obviously very subjective, which is what makes it so much fun.
Of course, I play this game with myself every day with more money and I always win and get in trouble for shopping too much.
IMPROMPTU PARTY
Ina Garten, one of my faves, wrote in one of her cookbooks that even when she and Jeffery didn’t have any money and were both in school she still had dinner parties. No one cares as much as you do that the placemats and napkins don’t match and everyone has different drinking glasses – they are just happy to be there and be served.
So the two of you just decide to have a Sunday dinner, Saturday brunch, Friday happy hour or weekday leftover party and invite people over last minute. Those are mostly the most fun parties to have.
WEBSITE GIFT-OFF
See shopping contest, but do it on-line. Send each other a secret gift for agreed upon price.
HOW MANY GRAPES?
I am super grasping at ideas now. But it is very telling how many grapes your sig other can fit in their mouth. Here is the chart:
10-15 grapes: This person is very intelligent. Especially if they can figure out how to eat all those grapes without taking them out of their mouth.
5-9 grapes: This person likes the finer things in life. They are also most likely to burp after removing the grapes even if they didn’t drink or eat anything.
1-4 grapes: This person needs help. They are most likely lying that they can’t get just one more grape in. Don’t trust this person or let them order on their own in a restaurant.
